Some moron decided it would be a good idea to see what Barbie would look like had she aged with the rest of us and here is what they came up with:
Yikes! Now, let me first say that true beauty is internal and it radiates from within. All other forms of beauty are external, and let’s face it, if you don’t first have the internal, the external plight is hopeless. What I mean is this: if you’re ugly on the inside, it doesn’t matter how outwardly pretty you might appear, because that internal ugliness will shine through and your outer beauty will quickly fade. We’ve all met people who look gorgeous and then they start talking and you realize they are just plain ugly; and we’ve met not-so-good-looking individuals who start talking and become more and more beautiful as they speak.
Inner beauty trumps outer beauty every time.That being said, Barbie possesses no internal beauty because, obviously, she’s a lump of non-living matter. She has only one source of beauty and that is dependent on how she is made in the factory. Barbie needs her cute little figure, her perfectly plumped, pink lips, her shiny blonde hair and her dynamite smile to attract not only Ken and GI Joe, but potential buyers as well. See, Barbie is a tool for imaginative play. Barbie is a toy and like any other toy, she must appeal to the child. Now, I ask you, does this aged, non-make-up-wearing Barbie appeal to children? Not any children I know!
What are parents supposed to do…give their daughters this version of Barbie and say, “See, honey, in forty years you’re going to have no waist, your boobs will sag to your belly button, you’ll wake up looking like you tied one on last night even when you didn’t, your hair will thin and turn gray, and you’ll wet your pants when you sneeze. Ain’t life grand!”
Really?!? What child needs that dose of reality to spoil their imaginative play time? Helloooo? Does anyone else find this idea ludicrous? Hell, why not sell some Barbie Depends as an add on, and Barbie hormone pills…and while you’re at it, you better make sure you get some boner-building meds for Ken too, that is, if the makers plan to have him age with her. I'm not sure, in her current condition, that she could handle eighteen year old, Ken's erection. But, maybe I'm wrong... maybe we slap some wrinkle cream on her and some bright red lipstick and she could become Cougar Barbie.
Let’s face it…aging sucks. We all know it. We all try to fight it but it’s a reality we face daily…and our kids see us age. That’s real life; but guess what…kids play with toys to escape real life. They don’t want to play with ugly, hung-over, fifty year old, sagging Barbie. They want perky, fun, pretty Barbie.
Hell, don’t we all?!? ~