S.R.Claridge writes Mystery and Romantic Suspense novels. Her work has been said to have the energy of Dan Brown, the mystery of Mary Higgins Clark and the humor of Janet Evanovich. Claridge novels will take you to the edge of your seat, keep you guessing until the very end and ultimately warm your heart. It is on the pages of every S.R.Claridge novel that Mystery and Sensual Suspense collide.

For more information on bookings, interviews and upcoming releases, please visit the author website and Facebook fan page.

Thursday, February 7, 2013

Much is Said in Silence

Communication is essential to every human relationship; and at the very core of communication is love.  I’m not talking about goo-goo, gaa-gaa, romantic love.  I’m talking about genuine acknowledgment and respect for another individual.  I’m talking about a basic, fundamental proclamation of their existence in your world. 

Allow me to explain:

Even if you are angry and yelling at someone, the very act of spewing your emotions in verbal vibrations shows that you care enough to speak.  You care enough to open your mouth and explain your feelings to them.  It shows that on some level they are worth your time and your effort and your emotion.  Even if you don’t like the person, the fact that you take the time to tell them you don’t like them proves that on some deeper level you, at the very least, acknowledge their existence in your world.

Communication is what keeps relationships alive and growing.  Even when you love someone it doesn’t mean there won’t be arguments or disagreements… but love means you communicate your way through them and grow closer because of them.

Love does not mean you stop communicating.  Love tries harder. 

When someone goes deliberately silent, neither acknowledging a person’s reach, nor responding in any way to their attempts at communicating, it is a stance of hatefulness. There is no love in this form of stone-cold-silence. 

Let me say that I understand some people need time to process their thoughts before they respond.  Everyone is different and some take longer than others to think and pray before they speak.  The difference is neither right nor wrong.  However, during the processing period, an acknowledgment of existence should be issued.  It can be something as simple as:  “I received your email and will get back to you soon.”  An acknowledgment is an act of communication and an action of love that can belay much heartache and misunderstanding. 

An acknowledgment is an action that says, “I care.” It doesn’t mean a person must discuss things right away.  It doesn’t mean they have to change their processing time.  It is simply a return reach in the direction of communication. It is a deliberate gesture that says, “you are worth my time to respond.” 

When a person goes silent with no acknowledgment whatsoever, it is a deliberate power play of hate and ego.  It sends a message that the other person is neither worth their time nor their energy.  It says that the person doesn’t matter in their life.  It says that the person is not worth any effort whatsoever.
Much is said through deliberate silence.

Silence is one of the greatest human character weaknesses and ironically it usually shares a bed with arrogance. ~

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