During a recent
interview I was asked an interesting question:
“If someone were to write a book about your life, what would it be
titled?” The answer instantly popped
into my head. It would be called, Fast Lane.
It all started when I
was a child. I would run everywhere. I would dash down the hallways so fast I’d
run into people and hurt them. My mom
often winced in pain, hollering at me to slow down, after I had inadvertently
crashed into her. I ate fast, danced fast, played fast, ran fast,
prayed fast, drove fast and grew up way too fast.
I was always in a
hurry, always rushing toward the next adventure, antsy for excitement and
wanting to experience everything life had to offer; no matter the risk. Danger
was less scary than boredom. I was never
a sit-in-front-of-the-television-all-night type of girl. I wanted to party. I wanted to smoke it, snort it, toke it, foil
it, bong it, bang it, crack it, taunt it, tease it, tempt it, taste it, make it
and ultimately squeeze every last juice out of life.
Looking back at my
youth, I did just that. I wrapped my
arms around life and squeezed it as hard as I could. My zeal certainly led me down some unsavory
paths; but damn, did I have fun! I made
mistakes and there are skeletons in my closet I wish I hadn’t put there; but
the good memories far outweigh the bad.
Whether I was driving
across the country all by myself in the middle of the night, bungee jumping at
the VP Fair, flashing my tits in New Orleans to earn some beads, snorting lines
at a Hall & Oates concert, going to a nudist colony in Malibu, kissing
another woman, dancing erotically in Hong Kong, having sex in a bull dozer or
on the big M in the middle of Faurot Field…. I was living in the fast lane,
with the crisp, cool wind in my hair and the moonlight reflecting wildly in my
eyes. I was alive.
Now, as I learn to
embrace my forties, I often fight my body’s urge to enter the slow lane; but
not my spirit. I still want to party
like a rock star, jump from a plane, dance wildly, have a lot of sex and every
so often, go a little crazy. I want to
laugh harder, act sillier, love deeper, be less afraid, be more open, more
willing, sweeter, kinder, more passionate and embrace life in a way I’ve yet to
imagine.
The way I see it, my
youth was simply a training ground and life in the Fast Lane is just beginning.
~
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