2015 is to be a year of change. That is my one and only resolution. Change.
Things in my life will change and the change
will be for the better. Here is what I will do to make this change happen:
I will no longer
be fake in order to protect other’s feelings while mine lie unprotected and
stepped on. I will no longer waste my
time or concern on people who are only concerned with themselves. I will not strive to keep peace when that
very peace itself is a sham, a lie. I
will not keep people in my life who make me feel unappreciated, unimportant, forgotten
and worthless. I will protect my loved
ones and I will expect that protection to be reciprocated in my time of
need. Otherwise, the relationship will
be re-evaluated. I will not apologize
for who I am or for the fact that the little things in this existence matter
most to me. I will not feel bad about
the fact that I am a creative and emotional being, who feels both overwhelming
joy and crushing heartache. I will not apologize for the things that I
need… like the need to be heard, to be respected, to feel that my heart
matters, that my feelings are relevant, that even my silliest request would be
met with understanding…to be known and loved so deeply that I am cared for
without having to verbalize those wants. The
simple fact is that if I am important to you than what is important to me is
also important to you. That is
love. When you love someone, you strive
to show them, and for me love is best shown in the little things. Not lavish
gifts, but in simply making me feel important to you.
The latter half of 2014 was one of the darkest times for me and from the
darkness new life has been birthed in the form of change. Those who cannot love me in the little
things will not be trusted with my heart in the big things. Those to whom I don’t matter, will cease to
matter to me and that will be determined by your track record, which speaks truth even though your lips lie. For better is it to be alone, than to be made to feel worthless and "less than" at every turn. There is a defining moment
in everyone’s life… a moment when a choice must be made. Live according to others or live according to
yourself. I have chosen happiness and in that choice
comes the reality that I will cast from my life those that destroy my
happiness, no matter what title they bear.
2015 is a year of change and I will set the boundaries
necessary to make those changes. I will
no longer demand to be heard, for those that love me will hear me and those
that don’t are not worth my breath.
~
