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Burden of Proof

Have you ever been accused of lying?  Have you ever shared something with someone and you could see in their eyes that they didn’t quite believe you?  Like maybe they thought part of what you said was true or maybe they thought you were exaggerating the details, or maybe they thought you were just plain lying about everything.  Despite the fact that you were telling the truth, you suddenly feel an urge to defend yourself… to prove to them the truth you know.  It’s frustrating because as much as a part of you may want to give them the burden of proof they need, another part of you says, if they were really your friend they’d believe you without proof.  Friendship is a relationship of trust and faith.  When strange things happen in life, it’s your friends you expect to believe you, share in it with you, defend you and if necessary, battle with you.  A true friend doesn’t  turn against you because they don’t understand something that’s happening to you.  There are things in life that will happen that even you may not fully understand.  It’s a big world with a lot of people.  Life brings each of us unique encounters, both physically and spiritually.  I may not be able to grasp your encounters and you may not be able to understand mine, but it doesn’t negate their reality or their existence.  Whether life’s encounters are able to be proven with logic and fact, becomes irrelevant when compared to the very experience itself.  I’ve come to realize in life that if you walk around trying to prove yourself to everyone, you miss out on the joy of just being yourself.  You can’t worry about what other people may or may not think of you.  You can’t let someone else’s doubt affect what you know to be true.  You can’t waste your time trying to acquire some sort of proof for someone else… they have to walk their own journey of faith.  It's between them and God. If they’re too shallow to believe in you, then they’re not worth the time it would take to prove yourself….and chances are, you’d just have to keep proving yourself over and over for them…and that’s a waste of your joy and your time.  ~

The word of the day is.... UNBELIEVABLE.

I'd write more, but it actually says enough.  Just unbelievable.

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Cold As Ice

There will always be people in this world who will try to steal your joy, rob you of happiness and make you feel less than good enough.  Don't empower them with your tears.  They aren't worth the emotion.  When someone hurts you, say "ouch," give them a chance to right the wrong, and if they make an effort, forgive them.  BUT, if when you say "ouch," they ignore you, turn a cold shoulder, act aloof toward you and refuse to explain why they have grown annoyed by your presence, then pick yourself up and walk away with a clear conscience and a peaceful heart.  For they don't deserve you... and you certainly deserve better.  ~

I was going to add to this...but I think it says exactly what needs to be said.  ~

Annoyed and Aloof

I’ve never been so annoyed with anyone that I turned aloof toward them.  I find this behavior inexcusable and downright heartless.  I’ve been angry, enraged, pissed off, held a grudge, scowled, said mean things and lashed out at people in my life…thankfully not often…but I’ve never once turned a cold shoulder, ignored them or treated them as if they were meaningless to me.  I can’t imagine hating someone to the degree that I blow them off in a purposeful manner to make them feel disregarded and utterly used.  What kind of cold heart exists inside the people that behave this way?  I find it inconceivable to even ponder.  Is it that they are so calloused over by their own emptiness that they don’t realize what their aloof attitude does to others?  It is no wonder they have few friendships and even fewer meaningful relationships.  For how does one befriend a person who turns icy and aloof at the onset of annoyance?  How does one communicate with someone who refuses to respond and, when they do, it is only to point fingers and shift blame?  I’ve pondered this and the only answer I can come up with is the sad fact that you cannot befriend them….at least not for long.  They will turn cold and banish you from their world.  It is only a matter of time.  They’ll tell you that the more you annoy them the more aloof they’ll become, thereby leaving you no other option but to disappear from their life.  They’ll assume no responsibility for their own hurtful actions and they’ll act surprised when they push your buttons to the point where you explode in anger.  These people are manipulative and mean-spirited to the core, thriving on the rejection they make you feel and then telling you not to wallow in the drama of it all.  You can’t fix it and you can’t change them, even if you care about them.  See, the bottom line is they have to care back in order to treat you the way you deserve to be treated…and these people are incapable of caring for anyone but themselves.  They don’t understand that friendship isn’t always blissful and happy.  Friendship, like any relationship, can be rocky and hard at times.  Friends fight and make up.  Friends make mistakes and forgive.  Friends scream at each other and hug.  Friends get annoyed but they respond with love.  Friends stomp away in anger but they always return.  True friendship is filled with ups and downs and twists and turns and repeated apologies and I love you’s. Friends are never aloof, never close a blind eye or turn a cold shoulder.  If you find yourself in one of these one-sided “friendships,” where you’re doing all the reaching out and they’re blowing you off … run.